This is the second in a series of articles I’m writing in connection with a Women’s Bible Study I’m hosting.  We are studying the fruit of the Spirit and the second class is about Joy.  I’ve titled the articles “Meditations” because in my preparation, I find there is so much to take in, so much attention given to these qualities throughout the Bible, that the best way to sort through the information is to take a step back and consider and reflect.

Recently, I invited friends to a women’s Bible study on the fruit of the Spirit from Galatians 5.

I decided we would spend one class on each quality, so I set up a nine-class outline, created a generic study sheet, and sat back, thinking this would be a simple class.  Only when I got out my notebook and Bible and began to work on the first “fruit” - love,  I realized it was anything but simple! Where to start? No, seriously, where to start?  In describing the fruit of the Spirit, Paul began with love, perhaps because all the other qualities are grounded in love.  But how was I to even begin narrowing our focus on a concept that is woven into every theme and is the very theme of the Bible?  I was overwhelmed at the task and quickly humbled from my overly confident approach to our study.

My husband and I live in a congested city in a house that’s over 100 years old. It’s a brick house, built to last. It’s got a lot of character. Translation: it’s really great to look at, but something is always in need of repair. Water has found its way into the house in at least four different locations. Pipes have broken, and water has pooled up in the basement as well. The back stoop steps are leaning sideways, and the doorknobs are almost daily falling off the doors and into the floor. The house demands our attention.

In Romans 14:19, Paul writes, “So then, let us pursue what makes for peace and for mutual upbuilding.” What if everyone I encountered today followed that law? What if at least I did? Why is peace so difficult to maintain? Why are the people I care for the most often the hardest to get along with? What are we to do when we disagree?

“There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing” (Proverbs 12:18). Oh, the power of our words! We’ve all been subject at some time in our lives to words that cut like a knife. And we’ve all watched with regret as our own words hurt someone as deeply as any weapon. James calls our tongue “a restless evil, full of deadly poison.” How we long to be the perfect man he speaks of that “does not stumble in what he says.” Yes, if we care about our relationships, we will have to learn to be “slow to speak” (James 1:19).

In the first article in this series, we established that the Bible is the most important tool in our toolbox for improving our relationships. The next piece of equipment we need? A mirror. When I am serious about working toward better relationships, the first place to start and the only element I can control is myself. In this and the next three articles, we will look to improve ourselves using as a guide James 1:19, “let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.”

I just checked, and a search on Amazon for “Improving” and “Relationships,” brings over 10,000 results! Apparently, there’s quite a market for people looking to improve their relationships.